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It does not take long to go from being friends to lovers.


Think back, do you remember hearing these words over and over and not knowing what to do and feeling frustrated, mad, and going through a hard time accepting it? They wanted to be your friend, but for some reason, you twisted and turned it and did everything you could to try to convince them that being friends was not what you wanted.

What if we’re not just friends?

You wanted a relationship. Take heart as it may not be another case of unrequited love. Developing friendship before the relationship is eventually a good thing for both of you. After trying to convince them, you may have finally decided it was time to give up and walk away. Yet it took you a long time to let go.

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Many people have been through this. So is keeping a friendship before relationship good or bad? Friendship is the first thing you need and very important when it comes to developing a relationship. Being friends gives you the opportunity to get to know the person for who they are and gives you the opportunity to learn things about them that you would not have learned otherwise. When you jump into a relationship without being friends first, all types of issues and challenges may occur. You begin to expect more from the person and sometimes set unrealistic expectations.

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By putting friendship before a relationship, you can easily decide whether they are the perfect one to date or not as there will be no pretense and more open space to talk about things that matter. Why put so much pressure on someone because of your own expectations and desires?

When you develop a genuine friendship, there are no expectations. You both can be your true selves. You can learn everything you want to know about each other. When it comes to a friendship, there are no strings attached and you are free to date and see other people if you like. If your prospective partner asks you to just be friends with them, take it in your stride, and give them just that.

Give him friendship without expecting it to blossom into a relationship. Being friends before lovers also ensures that the initial infatuation wears off.

12 reasons why you need to build friendship before relationship

You are able to see the other person for who they are and also present your real self to them, which is an excellent foundation for a long-term relationship. In any case, friendship in such a relationship is also important to keep the cogs turning. Well, they all placed friendship before relationship and their platonic bond worked out just fine.

And it can happen just that way in real life too. Only if building a friendship before a relationship is a priority for you.

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Being friends before dating is never a bad idea as it means that there is nothing superficial about the relationship. In fact, the chances of having a successful relationship also go up if you are a friend first.

I tried it: i hired a friendship coach

Well, it all depends on what your initial chemistry is like and how it develops as you get to know each other. For some, the transition from friends to lovers happens within months while others may take years. So, the next time they ask you to just be friends, consider saying okay, and remember that this is an opportunity for you to get to know them without being emotionally tied.

Many times, being friends is the best option. You get to know their real self and not who they pretend to be.

Challenge #1: tap into your friends of friends network

You can date and get to know other people if you want. You can decide if being friends is better than being in a relationship with them.

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Putting friendship before a relationship gives you the opportunity to be free, free to be who you are, and free to choose to be in a relationship with him or not. Take Course. Marriage Advice.

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LaWanda N. She focuses on transforming the lives of women through counseling, coaching and speaking. She specializes in helping women overcome their unhealthy relationship patterns and provides them solutions for it. Evans has a unique counseling and coaching style that is known for helping her clients to get to the root of their problems.

Share this article on Share on Facebook. Want to have a happier, healthier marriage? Evans specializes in helping couples build and maintain a healthy, loving, lasting, strong relationship.

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She teaches couples how to communicate to be heard and understood, how to manage conflicts and find solutions to the most difficult problems affecting their relationship, using the Gottman Method Couples Therapy approach. She provides relationship counseling, education, and development that focuses on improving communication, managing conflicts, affair recover, and premarital counseling and education. Relationship What Is Marriage? Recent Articles.

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So why is it that the friends-to-lovers paradigm bears such perennial relevance?


But new research suggests roughly two-thirds of couples start out as friends and maintain a platonic relationship for long periods before sparking a romance.


You text each other all the time.


I was heading into a new decade of my life feeling strong about my career, my life accomplishments and my relationship with my partner.