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Women are hornier in their 30s — it's science

In a culture so obsessed with sex, hookups and Tinder, it can be easy to question your own libido. Is it too low? Too high?

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Just right? And is thinking about sex all the time normal? On one end of the extreme, he means the absence of any sexual desire—and not because someone identifies as asexual.

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On the other end is sex addiction, though some experts argue there is not enough evidence to classify compulsive or hyperactive sexual behavior as an addiction. Some people might want sex multiple times a week. Others, once a month or less.

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Variation is normal, Anawalt says, because sex drive is influenced by a plethora of things—not just hormones. Millennials supposedly invented hookup culture but are actually having less sex than older generations.

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For most people, thinking about sex daily is still the norm, says Anawalt. In general, men and women tend to think about sex equally as oftenthough the thought processes of individual people obviously differ. The true difference is in the way people define sex, Anawalt says.

Men tend to define the act by a familiar formula: erection, orgasm and ejaculation.

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Women can be sexually aroused without actually wanting to have sex—and vice versa. Men are also more visual when it comes to sex, says Anawalt.

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Three hormones are related to interest in sex: Testosterone, estrogen and oxytocin. Contrary to popular belief, testosterone is not only important for men and estrogen only important for women.

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Estrogen is also important for women because it helps prevent vaginal drynesswhich can make sex painful. Interestingly, however, hormones alone are not as powerful in determining libido as we typically think they are. Medications can have a particularly powerful effect, says Anawalt. Antidepressants prevent the brain from reabsorbing serotonin and dopamine, two neurotransmitters that play a role in libido. With sex, another person is involved—a person who maybe insulted you yesterday, for instance.

The 7 most common sexual fantasies and what to do about them

If the pandemic messed up your work-life balance, here are some tips for fixing it. The sway of hormones…or not Three hormones are related to interest in sex: Testosterone, estrogen and oxytocin. Pretty much anything else, actually.

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