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  • What is my age:
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  • Namibian
  • Tint of my iris:
  • Big gray
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We include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on thiswe may earn a small commission. But not everyone is equally comfortable talking about intimate matters, especially when it involves tastes or preferences after being together for so long. To get help on how to communicate or liven up the relationship, we reached out to eight sexologists and asked them to share their best tips. A study published in Cortex a journal dedicated to the brain and mental processes identified the most sensitive spots on your body. Find out!

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Sex is vital in marriages, many counsellors have said, although as the years pass by, how often you and your spouse engage in it can ebb and flow.

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Actually, according to some experts, the frequency of sex in marriage is not the main issue, but how enjoyable the action is in the bedroom. In fact, some people are believed to have happy, fulfilling, and healthy romantic relationships without having regular sex with their spouses.

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But for some other couples, a happy, fulfilling, and healthy marriage means having sex on a regular basis — anywhere and at any time of the day. Each to their own!

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No matter which side of the divide you are, many counsellors, as well as scientists, believe that sex has a lot of benefits for marriages. For example, it could be an opportunity to bond with your partner or to show your partner love and affection. You could also have sex with your spouse to get pregnant and have .

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Also, sex could just simply be for the pleasure and fun of having it. Speaking of the pleasure in having sex, this is perhaps where many partners need to improve on their game because, according to experts, if sex feels boring to your spouse, they will probably avoid having it with you.

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And when they do, naturally, you will end up feeling rejected and confused. They may just not want to get into what leaves them hanging in the end. According to experts, the following are some ways you might be making sex boring for your spouse, plus tips on how to overcome the boredom and ultimately rejuvenate your sex life. However, there are other things that are more emotionally important and intimate than intercourse.

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So, couples should not focus only on intercourse during sex. Abandon the performance-based mindset and adopt a pleasure-based approach instead. She noted that comparison could create unnecessary insecurities and resentment. Make new memories!

Find some common ground.

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Hence, to feel more comfortable in your body and more energised to explore something new in the bedroom, you must feel well-rested. Also, Brito encouraged couples to prioritise their time.

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Stop juggling too many balls in the air. Clear your schedule for rest, relaxation, and sexual activity. And since you need blood flow to your genitals for sexual arousal, keep up with regular exercise. Not only that, but exercise lifts your mood and gives you an endorphin boost — two necessary ingredients that promote sexual desire.

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Not learning new techniques In an article, a sex therapist based in the US, Sheila Gregoire, said not learning new techniques or new things could cause boredom in the bedroom. If you always have sex the same way and do the same things, it will seem boring, even if it still feels pleasurable. With role-playing, you can create and act out exciting sex scenarios in a trusted environment. If both you and your partner are open to trying it, role-playing can help improve sexual communication and passion in an otherwise boring bedroom.

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Set the stage for romance. Use your imagination to role play with each other.

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Not being spontaneous Gregoire said sex should not be scheduled. Yet, often, we may start kissing, and we may start feeling excited, but then we remember that dinner needs to be made or that we have to get ready to leave for somewhere in half an hour.

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It should be something that carries you away. And pity sex makes sex feel degrading.

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Of course, a woman could also make the gesture to her husband because relationships thrive when positive behaviours are taking place and each partner feels nourished and appreciated, according to psychologist and marriage therapist, Dr Jacqui Gabb, of the Open University in the United Kingdom. Apart from the above, Gabb also advised couples to never stop going on dates.

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Non-sexual closeness is important in relationships and can build other forms of intimacy. However, happy couples find ways to ease the pressure off through laughter. Not only are you easing the tension on the issue at hand, but laughter also boosts intimacy outside of the bedroom, too.

12 tips sexologists share for reigniting better midlife sex

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