- Years old:
- My sexual orientation:
- Eye tint:
- I’ve got dark dark eyes but I use colored contact lenses
- I understand:
- What I like to drink:
It's me. Well, as it turns out, if you're living in South Florida, it may really not be you! A study conducted by WalletHub rated the best and worst cities to find love and several cities in South Florida find themselves at the bottom of the list.
Well, reader, I married him, too, but not until I was What constitutes an unusual marriage constantly shifts. In a way, I represent a trend. The U. Census Bureau has shown that the average age of marriage has been rising for decades.
More generally, younger generations are more likely to be children of divorce and therefore approach marriage with more caution. Nonetheless, the average age of first marriage for women is just In fact, I withstood frequent drillings on the part of befuddled family, friends and even strangers.
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The inconceivability of my aloneness perhaps should have been a comfort—at least I had no obvious reasons that no one would ask, right? I had given up on having children many years before.
With my steely eyed personality, I started early to plan other ways to make my life meaningful. I dated, I shacked up, I broke up, then I started all over again. I never consciously marked marriage off my list of possibilities for my life, but like so many other single women, I lost my optimism. By the time I turned 40, then 45, I figured it would never happen and did my best to make peace with that fact.
I even tried an online dating site—the one with the complex couples-matching procedures purported to find someone just for you. In a five-state area, it found me exactly zero good matches, which I found hilarious even then.
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I admit, I did have five cats. He was as new to Florida as I was and perhaps even a little bewildered since he came from Canada. We discovered that we shared academic interests, became friendly colleagues, then good friends. He first asked me out in the stairwell of Colbourn Hall, where we both had offices. Bruce and I stayed friends, but it was another year or so before we had our first official date.
On a sweltering summer evening, we had a dinner reservation at a trendy downtown Orlando restaurant where the parking was terrible. Immediately, he rolled it down. Huffing and puffing, the sweaty woman choked out that she was having an asthma attack and needed to get home to her oxygen.
But she had missed the bus, and it would be another hour until the next one came.
Without any hesitation, Bruce told her to get into the back seat, and off we went, following her spare directions into the heart of the poorest neighborhood in town. Within 10 minutes, we had her to her door.
Ten easy minutes that no one else had been willing to take. Something I think of as mature love rose immediately through me that evening.
I knew that Bruce was someone I could trust to do well by me and by the world we share. Although the statistics show a rising average age of marriage, they also show that more and more people never marry at all, by either choice or default. And Bruce had never lived with even one cat, after all. Let me say, though, that romantic love can happen at any age. They are.
Maybe because I stayed single for so long, I know this as deeply as they do and value my friends, birth family, and pets intensely. Whatever its age, whatever its form, love is love.
She can be reached at [ protected]. I remember the moment, a few months later, that I thought I might marry Bruce. The columns are the opinions of the writers, who serve on the UCF Forum panel of faculty members, staffers and students for a year.